These are strange, uncertain times in which we find ourselves. I imagine you must be worried sick by now; about getting the virus, about whether there really is a virus, and about whether you’ll ever be permitted to leave your house again without dressing like part of a hazmat crew. Well buddy, I don’t mean to trivialize anyone’s neuroses, but let me tell ya, I need to fuck.
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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Girls of BIUL, Idiot's Delight, Worst Of All
Something you probably don’t know about me, being that we are conversing in the odorless digital realm; I have olfactory senses on par with or equal to a woman’s. I can smell everything. All the time.
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Filed under Don't Know Don't Care, Faint Signals, Thousand Listen Club
This is one of the earliest strips and frankly I was too hard on ol’ Cannibal Corpse. I wrote the first strips while living in rural South Carolina. I’m still friends with the dude in the first panel but at the time I didn’t know where any of the old gang were. I was crabby and malnourished in general because I didn’t figure out a proper diet until around four years ago.
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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Don't Know Don't Care, Faint Signals, Late To The Party, Nostalgic Obsessions, Thousand Listen Club, Unfairly Maligned, Worst Of All
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Filed under Don't Know Don't Care, Worst Of All
There’s no “politically correct” way to say it; I’ve had so many lesbians as friends over the course of my life that I’m probably too comfortable around them. I kid around with them in a manner that can appear “offensive” to outsiders. Folks, maybe the Sapphists are different where you come from, but in my personal experience, real lesbians are borderline impossible to offend.
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Filed under Comix Classic & Current, Girls of BIUL
I tell you this as a friend. It won’t be easy for you, but worthwhile things in life seldom are.
Your feelings deserve to be hurt.
No guarantee exists in life that your feelings will be unhurt. No more so than your bones or flesh. In fact; let’s start off with your bones. Remember when you were a little kid, and your bones throbbed in pain all the time? What did the grownups call that?
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“Battle not with monsters,
Lest ye become a monster.
And if ye gaze into the abyss,
The abyss gazes also into you.”-Friedrich Nietzsche
Hi there. My name is Matty Boy Anderson. I’m a cartoonist!
See?
If you’re new to this site, thanks for coming, I’m glad you’re here. If you’re not, consider this a refresher course! This one’s for the noobs!
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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Faint Signals, Girls of BIUL, Late To The Party, Nostalgic Obsessions, Robot Toy Fetish, Site Stuff
Twenty years ago, I drew the first batch of Bands I Useta Like strips.
Twenty years ago.
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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Don't Know Don't Care, Girls of BIUL, Magazine Rack, Thousand Listen Club
“Little Girls” is the first track off of Only A Lad, the first LP from Los Angeles new-wave band Oingo Boingo. When I was only a lad, it was sort of a personal anthem. You probably know it, it starts with:
I – I – I love little girls, they make me feel so good
I love
Little girls, they make me feel so
Bad
When they’re around they make me feel like I’m the only guy in town
I love
Little girls, they make me feel so
Good
Fairly innocuous, right? It’s cute, if you don’t read too much into it. Or, avoid watching the video.
An Elfmanic episode.
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Comedy stinks right now because you forced it to stink. You vilified every experience in life that makes a great comedian. You made the safe, sponsored version of laughter the norm. You’re so afraid to really laugh in front of other people, that you turned comedy from an anti-establishment weapon into a cottony security blanket.
Comedy stinks right now because of you. Because you’re afraid of your true feelings.
You probably don’t even know who this is.
Let’s take, as an example, one of these pusillanimous women that the media holds up as Queens of Comedy. You know the ones, I don’t have to name them. They’re all over glossy magazine covers at the checkout aisles, making “zany” faces to remind you they’re funny.
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