Category Archives: Girls of BIUL

The Qotile Ultimatum


Part of being an inscrutable artist weirdo like myself is that you love it when people buy gifts for you, but you never buy gifts for anyone, because you feel an inner obligation to instead create something for them, which you then you take forever to do, and you just end up looking ungrateful.

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Filed under Faint Signals, Girls of BIUL, Nostalgic Obsessions, Thousand Listen Club

Serf and Terf


I like to think I handle disrespect pretty well. I’ve been told I’m not funny before, I’ve been told that my cartoons are badly drawn, and it doesn’t bother me. I’m not in high school; I’ve been published and working for over thirty years, and I know full well what I’m capable of and what I’ve accomplished thus far.

If I’m disrespected as a man by another man, the solution is very simple.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Girls of BIUL, Thousand Listen Club, Worst Of All

Tell Your Dumb Wife To Shut Up


I know at least one or two of you out there have been wondering why I’ve posted so infrequently this year, and why I went completely AWOL from social media. Since the truth is bound to trickle out very soon, I thought I’d break the news here, where it can be shared with the most readers. Guess what friends:

💑 💒 💕 💘 ❣ I GOT MARRIED!!! 💑 💒 💕 💘 ❣

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Filed under Bad Influences, Girls of BIUL, Great Hamsters I Have Known, Podcastery, Unfairly Maligned, Worst Of All

Too Rare To Die


I have a 100% real, absolutely serious offer for any women in the audience over the age of 18. I assure you; although I am a humorist, this is no joke.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Girls of BIUL, Worst Of All

Straight Talk


I’m ostensibly going to talk about double standards in the media for a bit here. I may repeat myself from previous articles for emphasis. Consider yourself warned.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Don't Know Don't Care, Girls of BIUL, Worst Of All

On The Offensive

Some people live their entire lives without ever realizing the restraints the real world puts upon them. They work a regular 9-to-5 job, watch regular TV shows, and read the comics in the Sunday paper, regularly. They make small talk with everyone they know, and keep any heavy thoughts they might have to themselves.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Girls of BIUL, Nostalgic Obsessions

Count To Fifty

The gist of my sentiments here today is this: on the 27th of this month, I will be fifty years old. I don’t understand it any better than you do. I feel no older than 38. I don’t look at my face, hands, or body and see those of a fifty-year-old man. I can walk a mile in ninety-degree weather without issues. I don’t talk about it much because my age is a recurring reminder that my ability to empathize with other humans will only continue to dissipate.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Faint Signals, Girls of BIUL, Nostalgic Obsessions, Robot Toy Fetish

Museless

I have now passed the half-way mark on my least productive year in a decade. Even when I was practically homeless and actually starving a ways back, I was producing more work than I have this year. I know what the problem is.

That itself is the problem.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Girls of BIUL, Nostalgic Obsessions, Unfairly Maligned, Worst Of All

The Thirty Year Niche

From 1991.

This year represents a personal milestone for me, in that I have now been creating and self-publishing my own comics for thirty years.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Faint Signals, Girls of BIUL, Magazine Rack, Site Stuff

Acceptance

Pictured: The serenity to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know who should go fuck themselves.

In case you missed it, Bands I Useta Like (the comic strip, not the site you are currently reading) is over. I am forced to accept that a printed periodical outlet for the strip I have drawn for the past twenty-three years no longer exists. This is the theme of the 2020’s; forced acceptance and submission. Historically, I do well with neither.

So, in the spirit of the current times, I am accepting my own flaws and shortcomings as personal advantages, and forcing them on the rest of society and the world. As a pipe-tooting sailor once said, I am what I am.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Girls of BIUL, Site Stuff, Unfairly Maligned, Worst Of All