Category Archives: Bad Influences

Uncle Owen’s Cabin

Deep cleansing breaths.

Some people are fans of something because the person that created it paid them attention.

I’m kind of curt about the fact that I don’t take suggestions from the audience. I don’t mean to be rude, but here’s the issue. If I take a suggestion, I am now beholden to the one who made it.

Not only that, I’ll have set a precedent, wherein that person will peruse my work in perpetuity, hoping for another use of the suggestion. It’s a kind of writer/audience codependency, and it’s unhealthy for either party.

It’s common practice in digital culture. Continue reading →

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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Worst Of All

Metallica

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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Faint Signals, Late To The Party, Thousand Listen Club

Shitting Monsters

From BIUL #2.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Don't Know Don't Care, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Magazine Rack, Nostalgic Obsessions, Worst Of All

No News Is Good News

Let me tell you one of the ways my beloved mother drove me up the wall when I was growing up.

She watched the 5 O’Clock News every day.

Bum bum BUM bum BUM!

Bum bum BUM bum BUM!

I grew up in Jersey, part of the Tri-State Area, which includes New York, where I was born. In 1972. Otherwise known as The Year Everything Went Straight To Hell. Continue reading →

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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Eatable Things, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Nostalgic Obsessions, Worst Of All

Disappointment: Childhood’s Elegy

From BIUL III.

From BIUL III.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Don't Know Don't Care, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Magazine Rack, Nostalgic Obsessions, Robot Toy Fetish, Worst Of All

Oh, Brother

Let me be clear about something, so there is no misunderstanding amongst the finger-pointers.

I love women. 

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[file photo]

More than probably anything else. They are intrinsically exciting to me. Not just their hills and valleys; I can get worked into a froth thinking about Camille Paglia cocking an eyebrow. I have chased women at the expense of my sanity and livelihood, even the ones I wasn’t trying to fuck. Some women beam out female energy like a supernova, and I just want to be close to it, like a moth to a flame.  Continue reading →

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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Girls of BIUL, Uncategorized

Bless This Mess

No need to thank me. I won’t say “I told you so”. I won’t rub it in, or be a “sore winner”. I’m good like that.

I'm sorry you're having trouble. (BONK) I'm sorry you're having trouble.

I’m sorry you’re having trouble. (BONK) I’m sorry you’re having trouble.

Appreciate that the desire to gloat is strong, however. The Left made their bed; now they can die in it. They were so terrified of Bernie Sanders’ predicted landslide victory that they lied, cheated and stole to sabotage it. I’ll never, ever forget or forgive their cowardice and manipulation. But this is a “comedy site”, so let’s put all that aside for the time being.  Continue reading →

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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Idiot's Delight, Late To The Party, Uncategorized, Worst Of All

The Cramps

biul_cramps

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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Faint Signals, Girls of BIUL, Nostalgic Obsessions, Thousand Listen Club

Freddy vs. Jason

Horror icons are sparse in the 21st century for a very simple reason. Horror used to be adults scaring children. Now it’s all about creepy children scaring adults, and adults don’t scare the way kids do. Hence, a decent slasher flick gets forgotten after four or five years, regardless of how many sequels it has (witness the interminable Saw franchise of torture-porn).

fvj1

Two of the most enduring figures in terror are Freddy Krueger and Jason Voorhees, of the Nightmare on Elm St. and Friday the 13th franchises. Both are bogeymen; mythical killers of young folks, in familiar settings. Therein lies the key to their longevity and appeal. Continue reading →

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Filed under Bad Influences, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Movies You Missed, Nostalgic Obsessions, O'Shloktoberfest, Saturday Movie Matinee, Thousand Listen Club

(Every Day Is) Halloween

Let’s say you’ve decided to become a “Goth”. These are some things you can expect:

  1. No friends, aside from other Goths.
  2. No attention, aside from that of other Goths.
  3. No respect from anyone, aside from other Goths.

Goths have made a full-time commitment to a bad mood. It’s like a lifestyle built entirely around PMS. If a Goth is older than 25, you’re looking at severely damaged goods. Elvira is literally the only person who can pull the look off successfully.

Damaged goods she is not.

Damaged goods she is not.

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