It’s 2016, and I can tell you’re not ready. The last twelve months really added wear and tear. You’ll have to do more than make resolutions you won’t keep, if you’re gonna roll through another year. I’m here to help, though. I’ve taken a good look under your hood, and I think I see the issue. It’s not a problem yet per se, but it could seriously affect your performance in the coming days.
Let me break it down for you.
Comments Off on Here’s Your Problem
Filed under Idiot's Delight, Late To The Party, Nostalgic Obsessions, Robot Toy Fetish, Saturday Movie Matinee, Uncategorized, Worst Of All
I seldom forget a good paroxysm of laughter. For example, one of the best memories of my time working at the mall record store involves an album played after closing, one night in 1993. Myself and two other employees were doubled over, purple-faced, unable to breathe from laughing so hard. It felt like the skin at the base of my skull was going to split.
The album was They’re All Gonna Laugh At You!, and the man responsible was Adam Sandler.
Comments Off on They’re All Gonna Laugh At You!
Filed under Bad Influences, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Saturday Movie Matinee, Thousand Listen Club
If you’re reading this on Christmas afternoon because your family is driving you nuts, and you have the technology, I suggest that you legally download The Iron Giant, from 1999. Gather everyone around, and watch it with them. It will make your holidays extra wonderful.
Comments Off on Animation Analysis: The Iron Giant
Filed under Animation Analysis, Movies You Missed, Robot Toy Fetish, Saturday Movie Matinee
It is impossible to get through a holiday season without watching Die Hard. Since its blockbuster release in 1988, this thrilling yet simple actioner- Bruce Willis against a gang of international thieves posing as terrorists to take over a skyscraper- has become a perennial favorite. Every so often another chapter of the Die Hard franchise emerges, attempting and failing to recapture the explosive magic of the first film. It can’t be done, and it’s not because Bruce Willis is now in his sixties.
Comments Off on How To Die Hard
Filed under Bad Influences, Faint Signals, Movies You Missed, Nostalgic Obsessions, Saturday Movie Matinee
In 1986, the greatest animated film based on a toyline in history premiered. It had celebrity voices, stunning visuals, and in the years following, it became an unstoppable cult classic.
A few months prior to that, Hanna-Barbera produced a cheap, ugly little movie, as is their wont, this time about warriors that turn into rocks. It had “celebrity voices” and the same discount animation they always used, and was quickly (and deservedly) forgotten. It was called GoBots: Battle of the Rock Lords.
aka “Gaybots, Babble of the Cocklords” (Petey, 6th grade)
Comments Off on Rock Monglers
Filed under Animation Analysis, Bad Influences, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Nostalgic Obsessions, Robot Toy Fetish, Saturday Movie Matinee, Worst Of All
Comments Off on Soundgarden
Filed under Comix Classic & Current, Eatable Things, Saturday Movie Matinee
Watership Down is a book written by English novelist Richard Adams, published in 1972 to worldwide adoration, about a cluster of wild rabbits who leave their home after the weakest of them accurately foresees its destruction. It is generally regarded as a literary classic, and perhaps most delightfully, it includes appendices of rabbit mythology, and a glossary of the lapine lexicon. In 1978, it was adapted as an motion picture by director Martin Rosen.
In my eyes, this adaptation is the finest animated film ever produced. Ironically, I was first exposed to it as a kid, because it was mistaken for a kids’ movie.
It isn’t.
It looks inspirational, but it’s actually a rabbit being strangled with a wire.
Comments Off on Animation Analysis: Watership Down
Filed under Animation Analysis, Faint Signals, Movies You Missed, Nostalgic Obsessions, Saturday Movie Matinee
I remember thinking in 2004 that “his name is Robert Paulsen” might be too obscure for the punchline. In the mid-2000s, it felt like I was the only guy who was really into movies like Fight Club and Idiocracy. If that sounds absurd to you, let me remind you of the fact that George W. Fucking Bush was in office. Continue reading
Comments Off on Meat Loaf
Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Faint Signals, Movies You Missed, Nostalgic Obsessions, Saturday Movie Matinee, Thousand Listen Club
In 1972, there was a schism in the world of “underground comix”. Its poster boy, Robert Crumb, had licensed his controversial Fritz the Cat to a pair of Saturday morning cartoon men, for a feature film production. Depending on whom you ask, the final result is either the fault of Crumb’s intransigence, the director’s dabbling, or the distributor’s trepidation about the content. The reality is that Fritz was never meant for franchising.
Comments Off on Animation Analysis: Fritz the Cat
Filed under Animation Analysis, Bad Influences, Faint Signals, Movies You Missed, Nostalgic Obsessions, Saturday Movie Matinee
BIG BOOK OF COMICS (SIGNED)
Original price was: $15.00.$10.00Current price is: $10.00.
You must be logged in to post a comment.