Category Archives: Idiot’s Delight

05/21/2017 · 11:17 am

The Pac-simile

Yea, I say unto you, I was in the right place at the right time for two major moments in American history. You must believe that what I’m about to tell you is the truth; it will seem like so much legend and myth.

The first: I was gifted a copy of E.T. (the game) for the Atari 2600, on Christmas, but that is a tale for another article.

I HAD TO PRETEND I ENJOYED THIS.

The second, and more significant: I talked my father into buying me Pac-Man for the Atari 2600, one of the most notoriously disappointing games of all time. Second only to E.T.,of course.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Nostalgic Obsessions

Tagged as 1980s, 1982, 1990s, Atari 2600, Atari 800 XL, corporate crap, Donkey Kong, E.T., Frogger, Great Videogame Crash of 1983, Howard Scott Warshaw, New Jersey, Pac-Man, smartphones, Terminator 2: Judgment Day, Tod Frye, Tron, video games, Yar's Revenge

05/02/2017 · 7:38 pm

War Stars

I vaguely promised you, that if I continued to rage upon what J.J. Abrams and Disney have done to the Star Wars saga, I would at least try to make it funny. Well, voilà, space jerks.

I’m making a funny game of it.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Worst Of All

Tagged as 1951, 1983, 1992, 1997, corporate crap, Disney, George Lucas, J.J. Abrams, movies, sellouts, Star Wars

04/27/2017 · 2:40 pm

Not The Nineties!

The May 2000 issue of The Last Laugh contained a do-it-yourself board game as its centerfold. It was called Not The Nineties!

I don’t know if anyone ever played it; I doubt it. The potshots are pretty brutal for a fun diversion. What can I say, the 1990s were actually pretty brutal themselves. The game provides a reasonably accurate simulation of trudging through ten unpleasant years.

(Printable game board included at the end of this article!)

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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Don't Know Don't Care, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Magazine Rack

Tagged as 1990s, 1991, 1993, 2000, Beavis & Butthead, Bill Clinton, Bill Gates, board games, Cheers, Comedy Central, Dana Carvey, David Hyde-Pierce, Drop Dead, Frasier, John Mahoney, Kelsey Grammer, Last Laugh, Mike Myers, O.J. Simpson, pre 9/11, Seattle, South Park, The Smithereens

04/24/2017 · 4:12 pm

Forever Insufferable

If it were up to me, this entire website would be nothing but pictures of womens’ tits. Oh, except in the sidebar, there’d be a link to all the reviews I’ve written about Transformers toys. If it were up to me.

Wait a second… it is up to me. It’s my site. So why don’t I?

Good question. I could probably make a tidy income doing it. So why not?

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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Idiot's Delight, Robot Toy Fetish, Worst Of All

Tagged as 1980, 1999, 2009, 2012, Bands I Useta Like, Ben Affleck, breasts, Edward Norton, Facebook, Futurama, J.J. Abrams, Mike the Pod, PlayStation, political correctness, Saturday Night Live, sellouts, Spike Lee, Star Trek, Star Wars, The 25th Hour, The Simpsons, Transformers

04/20/2017 · 7:30 pm

I Never Liked You: 2 Live Crew

Can I let you in on a little secret?

Nobody actually likes 2 Live Crew. They stank. They were the kind of fraud that today, would be secretly sponsored by George “Fuck Everything Good” Soros. 2 Live Crew was just garbage.

I don’t know what a “puxxy” is, but I bet if you popped one, it would make a bad smell.

It was humiliating to stock, sell or even see 2 Live Crew albums in the record store. As soon as a customer brought one to the counter, you knew there would be a problem. The customer was always under 18, and thus forbidden to purchase the music; no one older than 18 cared about it. If they enjoyed rap, they had already moved on to something actually good.

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Filed under Don't Know Don't Care, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Worst Of All

Tagged as 1980s, 1990s, 1994, 2 Live Crew, Andrew Dice Clay, Bling Bling, censorship, Dr. Dre, Eazy-E, fake rap, Full Metal Jacket, hip hop, Luther Campbell, Miami, N.W.A., Outkast, parental advisory labels, PMRC, rap, sellouts, Snoop Doggy Dogg, whores

· 10:39 am

Green Cards

On this special day, as many gather to celebrate the incineration of healing plants (or Hitler’s birthday/anniversary of Columbine, for the sickies), please enjoy these clip-n-save trading cards. They’re just the thing you need, for when you have to deal with the dark side of getting stoned.

Ask Mom for help before toking up, or using the scissors on your computer monitor. Fold along center line.

“The Microphone”

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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Eatable Things, Idiot's Delight, Magazine Rack

Tagged as 420, Bands I Useta Like, comix, marijuana, underground

04/13/2017 · 2:16 pm

Insecurities Fraud

Pre-Internet, not knowing the meaning of a word was a pretty serious problem.

Look that up in your Funk & Wagnalls.

Someone who disliked you could put you on the spot, in front of a group, by quizzing you on the meaning of a word.

“Come on, everyone knows what that word means. Don’t you?”
“If you know so much, then what’s it mean?”
“Oh no, I’m not telling. You first.”

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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Idiot's Delight, Worst Of All

Tagged as 2010s, books, children, Facebook, Google, high school, Internet, smartphones, social media

04/07/2017 · 10:39 am

The Legend of Dickie Goodman

From BIUL III.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Don't Know Don't Care, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Magazine Rack, Nostalgic Obsessions, Worst Of All

Tagged as "Weird" Al Yankovic, 1950s, 1970s, 1977, 1989, 1999, Back To The Future, Bands I Useta Like, corporate crap, Dickie Goodman, Don Imus, Dr. Demento, Jack Davis, music, New Jersey, radio, sellouts, Star Wars, strips, suicide, The Phantom Menace, whores

03/30/2017 · 1:02 pm

Kurt Ro-Bain

From Bands I Useta Like Spring Break Special #1.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Idiot's Delight, Magazine Rack, Robot Toy Fetish

Tagged as 1990s, 2014, Courtney Love, Dave Grohl, El Duce, heroin, Kurt Cobain, MTV, Nirvana, suicide

03/27/2017 · 1:37 pm

Signature Moves

Why is Walt Disney’s signature on Star Wars?

Look, kids! Vague, controllable versions of things you love! Signed by a corpse who had no part in any of it! BUY BUY BUY!!!

Not just his name; his signature. As though he was the architect of its design. Walt Disney created Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck, right? Tinkerbell, sparkly glitter, and magic castles. Horrible TV-movies every Sunday. That’s Walt Disney. Around 1980, I was into Star Wars to get away from all that corny shit.

Now you’re telling me it’s Walt Disney’s property?

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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Idiot's Delight, Movies You Missed, Nostalgic Obsessions, Saturday Movie Matinee, Unfairly Maligned

Tagged as 1940, 1940s, 1970s, 1972, 1977, 1980, 1980s, Attack of the Clones, Carrie Fisher, corporate crap, Disney, Ernie Fosselius, George Lucas, Hardware Wars, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, Lemmings, Mark Hamill, Mickey Mouse, movies, Return of the Jedi, Revenge of the Sith, sellouts, Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back, The Matrix, The Phantom Menace

Category Archives: Idiot’s Delight

The Pac-simile

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War Stars

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Not The Nineties!

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Forever Insufferable

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I Never Liked You: 2 Live Crew

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Green Cards

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The Legend of Dickie Goodman

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