{"id":6189,"date":"2022-09-13T09:13:00","date_gmt":"2022-09-13T13:13:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/?p=6189"},"modified":"2024-12-20T19:12:53","modified_gmt":"2024-12-21T00:12:53","slug":"carry-stress-in-the-jaw","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/carry-stress-in-the-jaw\/","title":{"rendered":"Carry Stress In The Jaw"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-full is-resized\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Matty_Teeth.jpg?ssl=1\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"288\" data-attachment-id=\"6194\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/carry-stress-in-the-jaw\/matty_teeth\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Matty_Teeth.jpg?fit=550%2C317&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"550,317\" data-comments-opened=\"0\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"Matty_Teeth\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Matty_Teeth.jpg?fit=500%2C288&amp;ssl=1\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Matty_Teeth.jpg?resize=500%2C288&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-6194\" style=\"width:413px;height:238px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Matty_Teeth.jpg?w=550&amp;ssl=1 550w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Matty_Teeth.jpg?resize=300%2C173&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Matty_Teeth.jpg?resize=104%2C60&amp;ssl=1 104w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Matty_Teeth.jpg?resize=156%2C90&amp;ssl=1 156w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/a><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p><br>This is more of a mass update\/blog post than the typical fare I offer here, so please bear with me. Mucht appreciated in advance.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<p>A little over three weeks ago, my stress level became so astronomical, that while sleeping I crashed my jaw sideways hard enough to split my upper left bicuspid. This caused massive swelling in my gums, and had the side effect of making me pass out from extreme pain about once a day. All told I probably lost about a week, total. If you&#8217;re wondering how this affected my eating habits, try chewing literally anything without using your bicuspids or eyeteeth. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Today is the first day where I didn&#8217;t have to take several ibuprofen after awaking. Just to give you a general idea of the scenario with which I have been dealing. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Around the first of this month I was commissioned for a project making use of my abilities as a cartoonist with over thirty years of experience. This commission paid an advance of almost two grand, in the form of a check, which was deposited and being processed by my bank. Regardless of what you might think, it is not at all unusual for me to receive a payment that large, or larger. Because the check was in my bank, I began to have fantasies of being able to cover rent and expenses for the foreseeable future. I even entertained the notion that I could buy a new pair of sneakers, ones without holes in the soles. Hell, I could take a woman out on a date without going dutch or looking like the pauper that I am. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Oh yeah- and maybe I could see a dentist about my split bicuspid. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The check bounced. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So did my rent. My account was now overdrawn, during a period when I was able to maintain consciousness for about five hours a day. Because of the timing, I now had no way to buy food over the weekend. Food, by the way, that costs three times as much as it did in 2019. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>This is the closest I have come to going out of business. Without extremely generous donations, I would have starved last weekend. Compare this with just two years ago, when I was able to buy a new computer and Wacom tablet. Plus the shoes I&#8217;ve been wearing since. Hence the holes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I honestly don&#8217;t know how anyone can look at America, her people, or the living conditions that now prevail here and truly believe things are better, or that they ever will get better. I don&#8217;t think that anyone who voted for or supports the current administration is very smart. We are literally at a point in history where a president is calling anyone outside his party a terrorist. I don&#8217;t understand how anyone can abide such an abhorrent thing, and in fact I have violent animosity towards anyone who does. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In short, if you&#8217;re cool with the way things are in 2022 America, I hate your fucking guts. I would tell you to your face what a fucking dunce you are. You are responsible for everything bad in our country right now, including problems that lethally affect myself and my friends, and if I could get away with it, I would smash your jaw with a tire iron. I don&#8217;t know why I&#8217;m even bothering to write this; if you support the current administration, you can&#8217;t even read. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I have lost the ability to conceal my searing hatred for the American left-wing, Democrats, Marxists, or anyone who wastes my time defending their policies and ideals. I literally could not care less about how much you hate the right-wing, Republicans, Christians, or Donald Trump. None of them have caused me <em>anywhere near<\/em> the grief I&#8217;ve endured in <em>just the last two years<\/em> from the left. <em>Not one<\/em> of my close friends misunderstands my position on this matter. Want to know why?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Because my friends are all going broke paying for gas, food, or rent. My friends are, like me, stuck unable to find a better place to live, because everything has been bought up by corporations and their regime-shilling cronies. I&#8217;ve broken my rule here of never taking a side in politics; if you&#8217;re on the left of the political spectrum, <strong>I hate your fucking guts.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If you can&#8217;t see how the left has <em>irreparably harmed<\/em> this country, for good, again; you can&#8217;t even read these words. You&#8217;re shitting in a diaper right now wondering what the flashing things on the big rectangle are. You&#8217;re so irredeemably stupid that you think the nefarious influence of the Frankfurt School won&#8217;t result in America&#8217;s destruction. If you had two parents, they&#8217;re ashamed of you, because they probably paid your way through everything and you still turned out as a dumb shit. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Fuck you for stressing me out.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For real; <strong>fuck you. I hate your fucking guts.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>How oblivious does one have to be to see that the goal of the left is to <em>exterminate<\/em> people like me, my friends, and my family? How many times do they have to disparage my way of life before you wise up? <strong>Everything I want out of life is &#8220;wrong&#8221; now.<\/strong> How can you be cool with that? You think your head&#8217;s not next on the chopping block? What the fuck do <em>you<\/em> do that makes you so sure these people won&#8217;t rid themselves of you at the earliest convenience? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I offer no apologies for any artwork I&#8217;ve done in my life. If someone&#8217;s offended by it, <strong>good.<\/strong> They&#8217;re pussies who deserve to be bullied so maybe they can stop <em>being<\/em> pussies. I care as much about what offends them as I care about what they fuck; <strong>not at all.<\/strong> I honestly pray they&#8217;re offended to <strong>death.<\/strong> They want me to die? That goes <strong>double<\/strong> for them. <strong>Triple,<\/strong> if we&#8217;re playing by Wiccan rules. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I have <strong>never<\/strong> talked down to <strong>anyone<\/strong> on the basis of their race or gender, and yet I have to take that shit for being a white male, <strong>even from friends.<\/strong> (I refrained from putting that last word in quotes, you&#8217;re welcome.) I don&#8217;t tolerate that bullshit from <strong>anyone.<\/strong> Why would I? It&#8217;s fucking <strong>racist,<\/strong> right racism experts? Isn&#8217;t that one of the magic words that&#8217;s actually meaningless, yet can still harpoon careers, and ruin lives? Even with no proof, or basis in reality?  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>There&#8217;s an old SubGenius maxim; <strong>Fuck &#8217;em if they can&#8217;t take a joke.<\/strong> I&#8217;m done with people who can&#8217;t handle humor, or get offended. <strong>Fuck &#8217;em.<\/strong> I say this as a man who, in grade school, had to develop a sense of humor (as well as drawing talent) to deal with <strong>being mocked for everything.<\/strong> My hair, my glasses, my clothes, my mom being wheelchair-bound; you fucking name it. If I didn&#8217;t have a sense of humor, I&#8217;d be a mass murderer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here&#8217;s the bottom line, folks. If people can&#8217;t afford gas, food, or rent, then they sure as <strong>fuck<\/strong> can&#8217;t afford to buy anything I&#8217;m selling. That means <strong>I<\/strong> don&#8217;t eat. <strong>I<\/strong> don&#8217;t live. So forgive me if I don&#8217;t care about anything else other than my own survival. Forgive me if I&#8217;m violently angry at the ones I deem responsible. Don&#8217;t blow smoke up my ass pretending that you&#8217;re any different. My business is <strong>me.<\/strong> If it goes, <strong>I go.<\/strong> It&#8217;s not that fucking hard to grasp. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Just like it&#8217;s not that hard to understand that the stress brought on by all of this, on top of the bullshit that evil people have forced upon the citizens of this country for the <strong>last decade,<\/strong> with <strong>no end in sight,<\/strong> would cause an ordinary man to break his own teeth in his sleep. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed aligncenter is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-block-embed-youtube wp-embed-aspect-4-3 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<span class=\"embed-youtube\" style=\"text-align:center; display: block;\"><iframe loading=\"lazy\" class=\"youtube-player\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/8YEtHy9iEmg?version=3&#038;rel=1&#038;showsearch=0&#038;showinfo=1&#038;iv_load_policy=1&#038;fs=1&#038;hl=en-US&#038;autohide=2&#038;wmode=transparent\" allowfullscreen=\"true\" style=\"border:0;\" sandbox=\"allow-scripts allow-same-origin allow-popups allow-presentation allow-popups-to-escape-sandbox\"><\/iframe><\/span>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote has-text-align-center is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\">\n<p><em>In the multiplied objects of the<\/em><br><em>external world<\/em><br><em>I had no thoughts<\/em><br><em>but for the teeth&#8230;<\/em><br><em>and of Berenice I more seriously<\/em><br><em>believed that all her teeth were thoughts&#8230;<\/em><br><em>the white and ghastly spectrum of the teeth&#8230;<\/em><br><em>meditations were <\/em><br><em>never <\/em><br><em>pleasurable&#8230;<\/em><br><em>the phantasma of the teeth<\/em><br><em>maintained its terrible<\/em><br><em>ascendancy<\/em><\/p>\n<cite>[Poe]<\/cite><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This is more of a mass update\/blog post than the typical fare I offer here, so please bear with me. Mucht appreciated in advance.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"If literally anything offends you, read something else. Don't come crying to me.","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[2,5,8,77],"tags":[3331,3539,3465,21,156,3549,56,3547,1431,28,2620,809,3550],"class_list":["post-6189","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bad-influences","category-dont-care","category-idiots-delight","category-worst-of-all","tag-2020s","tag-3539","tag-america-country","tag-behind-the-scenes","tag-censorship","tag-chagrin","tag-corporate-crap","tag-corruption","tag-death","tag-despair","tag-existential-malaise","tag-mr-bungle","tag-stress"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p53HmY-1BP","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":593,"url":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/billy-joel\/","url_meta":{"origin":6189,"position":0},"title":"Billy Joel","author":"MattyBoy","date":"08\/31\/2015","format":false,"excerpt":"If you grew up in 1970s suburban New Jersey, as I did, you cannot judge Billy Joel or Bruce Springsteen objectively. It is analogous to Alabama's relationship with Lynyrd Skynyrd. A recording artist encapsulates the zeitgeist of a time and place so perfectly, the music becomes inseparable from that region.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Bad Influences&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Bad Influences","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/category\/bad-influences\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"BIUL_BillyJoel","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/BIUL_BillyJoel.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/BIUL_BillyJoel.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/BIUL_BillyJoel.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/BIUL_BillyJoel.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2299,"url":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/the-fifty-percent-rule\/","url_meta":{"origin":6189,"position":1},"title":"The Fifty Percent Rule","author":"MattyBoy","date":"08\/10\/2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Would you like the quality of life to increase exponentially over time? Try this. Enforce a rule that 50% of the cover of every magazine and periodical must be\u00a0professionally illustrated. The idea that the money doesn't exist to do this is a myth, and let no publisher tell you differently.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Comix Classic &amp; Current&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Comix Classic &amp; Current","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/category\/classic-comix\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"newyorker","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/newyorker.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":2383,"url":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/i-forgot-altergott\/","url_meta":{"origin":6189,"position":2},"title":"I Forgot Altergott","author":"MattyBoy","date":"08\/23\/2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Mea culpa. You know what? In all my apple polishing of cartoonists I admire, I've never mentioned Rick Altergott. What the\u00a0fuck. I even saw Altergott in person, at a MOCCA Festival years ago. I didn't approach him, because his abilities as a cartoonist scare the bejeezus out of me. He's\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Comix Classic &amp; Current&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Comix Classic &amp; Current","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/category\/classic-comix\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"doofus3","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/doofus3.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":3750,"url":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/an-afternoon-on-the-playground\/","url_meta":{"origin":6189,"position":3},"title":"&#8220;An Afternoon On The Playground&#8221;","author":"MattyBoy","date":"12\/05\/2017","format":false,"excerpt":"From\u00a0BIUL #1 (2014). DID YOU KNOW: Each issue of\u00a0BANDS I USETA LIKE\u00a0contains material that won't be shown on this site, no matter how desperate I am for content. Even if you've read everything on this site (good lord), there will still be stuff that's new to you in the magazines.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Comix Classic &amp; Current&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Comix Classic &amp; Current","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/category\/classic-comix\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/afternoon_playground.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/afternoon_playground.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/afternoon_playground.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":6004,"url":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/ralphie-boy\/","url_meta":{"origin":6189,"position":4},"title":"Ralphie Boy","author":"MattyBoy","date":"03\/27\/2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Imagine if everything you knew about human existence, from birth to death, was based on the years 2020 to 2022. Imagine if the worst two years of almost everybody's lives thus far encompassed your entire lifetime. Would it be a good life, or bad? Ralphie was my hamster. I loved\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Great Hamsters I Have Known&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Great Hamsters I Have Known","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/category\/great-hamsters-i-have-known\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/for_web6.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/for_web6.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/for_web6.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":6696,"url":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/the-dirt-scarcity-and-the-emptiness\/","url_meta":{"origin":6189,"position":5},"title":"The Dirt, Scarcity, and the Emptiness","author":"MattyBoy","date":"10\/16\/2023","format":false,"excerpt":"Hi there, friends and neighbors! I suppose it's been a while, hasn't it? Feels like it's been even longer. Life's funny that way. Not \"ha ha\" funny, but the other kind, whatever that may be called. Funny when it happens to someone else. Yeah, that works. It's been so long\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Bad Influences&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Bad Influences","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/category\/bad-influences\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/10\/Jackass4.jpg?fit=550%2C431&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/10\/Jackass4.jpg?fit=550%2C431&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/10\/Jackass4.jpg?fit=550%2C431&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6189","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6189"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6189\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7059,"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6189\/revisions\/7059"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6189"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6189"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6189"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}