{"id":5089,"date":"2019-11-07T11:07:24","date_gmt":"2019-11-07T16:07:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/?p=5089"},"modified":"2019-11-07T18:37:09","modified_gmt":"2019-11-07T23:37:09","slug":"house-lights-shows-over","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/house-lights-shows-over\/","title":{"rendered":"House Lights, Show&#8217;s Over"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"312\" data-attachment-id=\"5092\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/house-lights-shows-over\/_movietheater1\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/movietheater1.jpg?fit=550%2C343&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"550,343\" data-comments-opened=\"0\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"_movietheater1\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/movietheater1.jpg?fit=500%2C312&amp;ssl=1\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/movietheater1.jpg?resize=500%2C312\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-5092\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/movietheater1.jpg?w=550&amp;ssl=1 550w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/movietheater1.jpg?resize=300%2C187&amp;ssl=1 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>Maybe someday, in some perfect future utopia where I am long dead, the vaunted generation known as &#8220;millennials&#8221; will finally experience self-awareness. Maybe they will finally uncover the reason why they are so vehemently despised by literally everyone who came before them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<p>Millennials are despised because of what they say online. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You know what&#8217;s a safer bet than millennials ever figuring this out, in a million generations? A sun hat filled with dog shit winning the Nobel Peace Prize. That&#8217;ll happen twice before they do. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For almost my entire life, all I ever really cared about was <strong>the&nbsp;movies.<\/strong> I was a kid in the late 1970s, when the best movies were made. When I produced my own movie in 2008, it was the fulfillment of a lifelong dream. I used to fantasize in high school about seeing my name in scrolling film credits more often than I fantasized about banging any nubile you could name.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>By the time I was twenty I had seen hundreds, maybe thousands of movies. Horror, sci-fi, drama, comedy, you name it. It was a point of pride for me. I wanted to know all there was to know about the medium of cinema. I couldn&#8217;t get enough. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I&#8217;m forty-seven now. I&#8217;ve seen roughly ten new movies in as many years. I don&#8217;t give a fuck about movies anymore. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I waste a lot of my time trying to understand why I want to die so badly. Why am I so eager to give up? What is this indefinable feeling I once loved about living, that&#8217;s gone now, with a howling void in its place?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Simple. A common positive experience of my early existence has been murdered. Odds are you were the one holding the knife. You pulled the trigger of the smoking gun.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here&#8217;s what I&#8217;m talking about. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>In 1981, I attended three different birthday parties where we celebrated by going to a theater and seeing <em>Time&nbsp;Bandits.<\/em> Every one of us adored it and couldn&#8217;t wait to see it again. And again. And again.<\/li><li>My father introduced me to <em>Alien<\/em> and <em>The&nbsp;Shining<\/em> when I was too young for either, for which I am eternally grateful to him. He also introduced me to <em>Life&nbsp;of&nbsp;Brian,&nbsp;Caddyshack,&nbsp;Watership&nbsp;Down,<\/em> and after I bugged him enough, <em>10.<\/em><\/li><li>In the 1980s, having a VHS copy of any <em>Star&nbsp;Wars<\/em> or <em>Indiana&nbsp;Jones<\/em> movie made you more popular than having a swimming pool. I possessed a time-coded bootleg tape of <em>Ghostbusters&nbsp;II<\/em>, which attracted many new friends.<\/li><li>In 1990, Martin Scorsese&#8217;s <em>Goodfellas<\/em> was my true graduation into real cinema and film. Every single person I knew had seen it, loved it, and quoted it incessantly.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>You know what else came out in 1990? Steve Barron&#8217;s <em>Teenage&nbsp;Mutant&nbsp;Ninja&nbsp;Turtles<\/em> adaptation. Let me guess- you&#8217;ve got an opinion on that one. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In the 1990s, superhero movies were a <em>joke<\/em>. Tim Burton&#8217;s <em>Batman<\/em> was buoyed by Jack Nicholson&#8217;s Joker and Burton&#8217;s past successes. Beyond that, it wrecked Michael Keaton&#8217;s career for over a decade. Jack Palance was in it because he couldn&#8217;t care less what he got paid to do. Keaton returned to the cowl for a sequel, then hung it up. Probably because classic <em>Batman<\/em> rogue &#8220;The Penguin&#8221; had been mutated into Danny DeVito in a revolting sponge suit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Warren Beatty&#8217;s <em>Dick&nbsp;Tracy<\/em> premiered in 1990, too. While <em>Batman<\/em>&#8216;s production design had the late great Anton Furst, <em>Dick&nbsp;Tracy<\/em> had Richard Sylbert, making the adaptation a prestigious visual smorgasbord. Everything <em>Batman<\/em> did, <em>Dick&nbsp;Tracy<\/em> did better. (It didn&#8217;t have music by Prince, although the Sondheim tunes are wonderful.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"263\" data-attachment-id=\"5100\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/house-lights-shows-over\/_dicktracy\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/DickTracy.jpg?fit=550%2C289&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"550,289\" data-comments-opened=\"0\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"_DickTracy\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/DickTracy.jpg?fit=500%2C263&amp;ssl=1\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/DickTracy.jpg?resize=500%2C263\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-5100\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/DickTracy.jpg?w=550&amp;ssl=1 550w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/DickTracy.jpg?resize=300%2C158&amp;ssl=1 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><figcaption>Hand-painted. This is the kind of magic Disney once weaved. <\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>So right off the bat (sorry) you can see that the 1990s were the high point of comic book movies. Because there were <strong>only&nbsp;so&nbsp;many.<\/strong> They were <strong>special&nbsp;events.<\/strong> Not a fucking monopolistic industry run by people who don&#8217;t belong within ten miles of a movie theater.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Imagine if I were so ignorant and stupid that I backed up every opinion on this site with &#8220;I&#8217;m part of <em>Generation&nbsp;X<\/em>, after all.&#8221; Imagine if I was so dull and boring as a person that I had to constantly attach myself to a legion of strangers born roughly at the same time as I was. Why would you visit this site at all?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If I tell you my age or &#8220;generation&#8221;, it&#8217;s because I&#8217;m emphasizing that I was a child during these amazing moments in cinematic history. I was pliable and not at all cynical. I was lucky. And I was raised well enough by my parents that I want to share this joy, rather than selfishly keep it to myself until it dies with me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>That&#8217;s where I get the idea that I&#8217;m better than most people. Because I can demonstrate as much with no effort.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I&#8217;m doing it right now. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8220;Outrage culture&#8221; has validated anyone who vents their spleen on the Internet. Merit is an outdated, even disparaged value. It&#8217;s all about getting someone to click your link and expose themselves to your fevered id. Providing anything of actual substance is unnecessary. Just try to get people&#8217;s goat. That&#8217;s all that matters.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"450\" height=\"487\" data-attachment-id=\"5096\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/house-lights-shows-over\/_starwarsdies2\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/StarWarsdies2.jpg?fit=450%2C487&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"450,487\" data-comments-opened=\"0\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"_StarWarsdies2\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/StarWarsdies2.jpg?fit=450%2C487&amp;ssl=1\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/StarWarsdies2.jpg?resize=450%2C487\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-5096\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/StarWarsdies2.jpg?w=450&amp;ssl=1 450w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/StarWarsdies2.jpg?resize=277%2C300&amp;ssl=1 277w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 450px) 100vw, 450px\" \/><figcaption>&#8220;Of course they&#8217;re &#8216;just friends&#8217;- we&#8217;re trying to sell this shit in China!&#8221;<br><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>I cannot fathom the stupidity required to type out a thousand words claiming Marvel superhero movies are cinema. I don&#8217;t know how someone who considers <em>Avengers:&nbsp;Endgame<\/em> superior to <em>Raging&nbsp;Bull<\/em> operates a home computer. My impression of anyone who voices an opinion like that is of a shitting orangutan. If the writer is a &#8220;millennial&#8221;, how would they know? Calendar years are four-digit numbers. That&#8217;s a lot of heavy lifting for a dumbfuck.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Sometimes, when I am short on money, I consider walking into the path of a speeding train. It isn&#8217;t just that these so-called &#8220;millennials&#8221; are stupid; <strong>they&nbsp;are&nbsp;paid<\/strong> to write these astonishingly addlepated screeds about all the classics of cinema they find &#8220;problematic&#8221;. Why? Why should these opinions be monetarily legitimized?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So the <strong>millennials&nbsp;don&#8217;t&nbsp;kill&nbsp;themselves,<\/strong> because they can&#8217;t take even the slightest criticism or disagreement? Because they were never taught to deal with the very real possibility that <strong>they&nbsp;don&#8217;t&nbsp;matter?<\/strong> That in truth, <strong>no&nbsp;one&nbsp;does?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Get a load of this, folks. I am a lifelong expert on <em>Star&nbsp;Wars.<\/em> I am telling you, in my considered opinion, that every single Disney <em>Star&nbsp;Wars<\/em> movie is insulting garbage. <strong>Objectively&nbsp;bad.<\/strong> If you disagree with me, you are wrong. I am right. <strong>Tough&nbsp;tits.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Not only that- I have a <strong>right<\/strong> to be angry about what&#8217;s been done to <em>Star&nbsp;Wars.<\/em> I devoted almost my entire life to that fucking franchise. Disney took the heroes I idolized as a child and systematically humiliated and destroyed them. If you can&#8217;t create new ideas without annihilating the old ones, you goddamn don&#8217;t belong in Hollywood, or any form of gainful employment. You&#8217;re a bad person. You&#8217;re so devoid of imagination that all you can do is spite.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"234\" data-attachment-id=\"5098\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/house-lights-shows-over\/_terminatordf\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/TerminatorDF.jpg?fit=500%2C234&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"500,234\" data-comments-opened=\"0\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"_TerminatorDF\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/TerminatorDF.jpg?fit=500%2C234&amp;ssl=1\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/TerminatorDF.jpg?resize=500%2C234\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-5098\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/TerminatorDF.jpg?w=500&amp;ssl=1 500w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/TerminatorDF.jpg?resize=300%2C140&amp;ssl=1 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><figcaption><em>Terminator:&nbsp;Dark&nbsp;Fate<\/em> brought back Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton and James Cameron. Oh, also an androgyne who&#8217;s the spitting image of mass murderer Dylann Roof. <strong>Way&nbsp;to&nbsp;fucking&nbsp;go.<\/strong><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>At this point, every single money-making movie franchise has been ruined by political correctness. If you disagree, then you don&#8217;t care. I don&#8217;t care about tampons (<strong>because\u00a0I\u00a0am\u00a0a\u00a0man\u00a0and\u00a0do\u00a0not\u00a0menstruate<\/strong>), but this doesn&#8217;t mean I&#8217;ll fight my way to the top of the tampon industry just so I can fuck with what works, and make women miserable just because I can.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Every&nbsp;single&nbsp;profitable&nbsp;franchise&nbsp;has&nbsp;been&nbsp;ruined&nbsp;by&nbsp;political&nbsp;<\/strong><br><strong>correctness.&nbsp;Every&nbsp;single&nbsp;one.<\/strong> Are you cool with that? Then drop dead. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Star&nbsp;Wars<\/em> was the most profitable movie franchise <em>in&nbsp;world&nbsp;history,<\/em> and it was destroyed in <em>less&nbsp;than&nbsp;a&nbsp;year.<\/em> There was a trailer for the third part of Disney&#8217;s &#8220;trilogy&#8221;, and nobody cared except the dumb nerd who&#8217;s paid to cry about it. (No points for guessing which generation said nerd hails from.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"264\" data-attachment-id=\"5090\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/house-lights-shows-over\/_starwarsdies\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/StarWarsdies.jpg?fit=1000%2C527&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"1000,527\" data-comments-opened=\"0\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"_StarWarsdies\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/StarWarsdies.jpg?fit=500%2C264&amp;ssl=1\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/StarWarsdies.jpg?resize=500%2C264\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-5090\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/StarWarsdies.jpg?w=1000&amp;ssl=1 1000w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/StarWarsdies.jpg?resize=300%2C158&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/StarWarsdies.jpg?resize=768%2C405&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/StarWarsdies.jpg?resize=600%2C316&amp;ssl=1 600w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>I don&#8217;t have words for the hatred I feel towards Disney. I don&#8217;t know how to make it go away. Almost everything that brought me joy as a child has been violated by these savage pieces of inhuman shit. They didn&#8217;t just ruin <em>Star&nbsp;Wars<\/em> for me; they made me embarrassed to have ever liked it in the first place. I think about it and <strong>feel&nbsp;ashamed.<\/strong> It <strong>hurts&nbsp;me.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And on top of this comes the recent revelation that nearly every single personality in Tinseltown is a rapist, pedophile, or has been previously raped. If not, they&#8217;re in the midst of an ugly public breakdown over Donald Trump, whom they would eagerly murder in cold blood. These are the kind of people who tell me I&#8217;m stupid for taking <em>Star&nbsp;Wars<\/em> so seriously.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Why should any of this occupy a place in my life anymore?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I don&#8217;t go see movies, alone or with friends. No one I know really bothers. Everyone has a negative experience that keeps them far away from a theater. Time was, the worst thing you had to deal with was someone talking or eating popcorn too loudly during the movie. Now you can be mowed down by gunfire. Or raped, I&#8217;m sure; after all, we live in a &#8220;rape culture&#8221;, don&#8217;t we? That&#8217;s what the articles written by millennials all claim. I can&#8217;t remember the last time I went to the grocery store where I wasn&#8217;t raped, while every woman visible in daylight was being raped at the same time. Gee whiz, this &#8220;rape culture&#8221;, <strong>amirite?<\/strong> It&#8217;s a real strain on the ol&#8217; poop chute. Imagine if we lived in Saudi Arabia!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If you <em>are<\/em> a millennial, by all means, continue to inform the rest of the world. Remind us all that you&#8217;re too young to have the experiences we&#8217;ve had, and that you&#8217;re too young to have developed any wisdom. Then prove it by writing posts and articles about how everyone else is dumber than you. Be sure and rave about how you got your jollies watching a man in a superhero suit flop around in front of a green screen for three hours. Tell us all how wrong we are about James Gunn&#8217;s incessant and inappropriate pedophile jokes. Tell us how we <em>just&nbsp;don&#8217;t&nbsp;get&nbsp;it.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I&#8217;m older than you, I&#8217;m smarter than you, and I&#8217;m telling you this; the one who doesn&#8217;t &#8220;get it&#8221; is <strong>you.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Don&#8217;t forget to turn out the lights before you leave. The rest of us have already left the building, long, long ago.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed-youtube aligncenter wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-embed-aspect-16-9 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<span class=\"embed-youtube\" style=\"text-align:center; display: block;\"><iframe loading=\"lazy\" class=\"youtube-player\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/XFcxQEOqNLk?version=3&#038;rel=1&#038;showsearch=0&#038;showinfo=1&#038;iv_load_policy=1&#038;fs=1&#038;hl=en-US&#038;autohide=2&#038;wmode=transparent\" allowfullscreen=\"true\" style=\"border:0;\" sandbox=\"allow-scripts allow-same-origin allow-popups allow-presentation allow-popups-to-escape-sandbox\"><\/iframe><\/span>\n<\/div><figcaption>For the curious, the title of the article was paraphrased from this recording.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Maybe someday, in some perfect future utopia where I am long dead, the vaunted generation known as &#8220;millennials&#8221; will finally experience self-awareness. Maybe they will finally uncover the reason why they are so vehemently despised by literally everyone who came &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/house-lights-shows-over\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[2,5,8,342,10,75,11,77],"tags":[266,105,38,3189,3290,470,620,313,415,3285,2479,3287,1541,3288,1800,1697,3289,314,3286,3283,3284,602],"class_list":["post-5089","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bad-influences","category-dont-care","category-idiots-delight","category-movies-you-missed","category-nostalgic-obsessions","category-saturday-movie-matinee","category-unfairly-maligned","category-worst-of-all","tag-1970s","tag-1980s","tag-1990s","tag-3189","tag-anton-furst","tag-caddyshack","tag-dick-tracy","tag-disney","tag-frank-zappa","tag-ghostbusters-ii","tag-hollywood","tag-jack-nicholson","tag-martin-scorcese","tag-michael-keaton","tag-millennials","tag-monty-pythons-life-of-brian","tag-richard-sylbert","tag-star-wars","tag-steve-barron","tag-tim-burton","tag-time-bandits","tag-watership-down"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p53HmY-1k5","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2115,"url":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/helping-millennials-understand-the-simpsons\/","url_meta":{"origin":5089,"position":0},"title":"Helping Millennials Understand The Simpsons","author":"MattyBoy","date":"06\/25\/2016","format":false,"excerpt":"The world is\u00a0tough on young people, especially when there are forces trying to control them, often by coddling them. Every awkward feeling teenagers have is commoditized and acknowledged, no matter how insignificant. Their\u00a0bad moods are notated with special emoticons. Their hormonal bullshit is all validated as worthy expression. Coincidentally, almost\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Animation Analysis&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Animation Analysis","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/category\/animation-analysis\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"This gag's humor outlived the technology that inspired it.","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/06\/simpsons5.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":6237,"url":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/abort-yourself\/","url_meta":{"origin":5089,"position":1},"title":"Abort Yourself","author":"MattyBoy","date":"10\/22\/2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Want to hear a funny story? It's true, too. I used to be \"pro-choice\", up until not that long ago. I was pretty outspoken about it back in high school. Why do you think that was? Because I wanted to get laid. That was literally the only reason. Not because\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Bad Influences&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Bad Influences","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/category\/bad-influences\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/abort4.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":5286,"url":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/better-to-burn-out\/","url_meta":{"origin":5089,"position":2},"title":"Better To Burn Out","author":"MattyBoy","date":"02\/24\/2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Hypothetically speaking; when do you give up on your dreams? When do you quit? At what point do you just roll over and let the bastards win? Which specific failure indicates totality? How do you know it's not a minor setback, or a learning experience? You don't have psychic powers,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Bad Influences&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Bad Influences","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/category\/bad-influences\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/MitchCohen.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":5247,"url":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/ps-i-u\/","url_meta":{"origin":5089,"position":3},"title":"PS I &#x2665; U","author":"MattyBoy","date":"01\/05\/2020","format":false,"excerpt":"You folks ever see the movie All\u00a0That\u00a0Jazz, with Ben Vereen, Jessica Lange and Roy Scheider? You oughta check it out, it's great. And I'm not just saying that because it was one of the only ways you could see nudity on TV, as a kid of the 1980's. I vividly\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Bad Influences&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Bad Influences","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/category\/bad-influences\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/AllThatJazz.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/AllThatJazz.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/AllThatJazz.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":5407,"url":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/the-mask-of-virtue\/","url_meta":{"origin":5089,"position":4},"title":"The Mask of Virtue","author":"MattyBoy","date":"07\/27\/2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Before we begin; I hope for both our sakes that you're wearing your protective mask while reading this. I can't actually see you, so I have to implement the \"honor system\" and presume you're a \"good neighbor\" who won't somehow infect me with mystery germs through the endless tubes of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Bad Influences&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Bad Influences","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/category\/bad-influences\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/masks3.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/masks3.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/masks3.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2877,"url":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/ah-leia-akbar\/","url_meta":{"origin":5089,"position":5},"title":"Ah Leia Akbar","author":"MattyBoy","date":"12\/29\/2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Carrie Fisher, the beloved actress who played the role of Princess Leia Organa in\u00a0Star Wars,\u00a0is no longer alive. You're welcome for the update, recently-awakened coma victim. There is literally nothing I can say about this. Literally; even praise will be feted as heresy. Legendary comedian Steve Martin, who knew Fisher,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Faint Signals&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Faint Signals","link":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/category\/faint-signals\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/leia3.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5089","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5089"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5089\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5102,"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5089\/revisions\/5102"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5089"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5089"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bandsiusetalike.com\/biul\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5089"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}