Tag Archives: women

Hurt Your Feelings

I tell you this as a friend. It won’t be easy for you, but worthwhile things in life seldom are.

Your feelings deserve to be hurt. 

No guarantee exists in life that your feelings will be unhurt. No more so than your bones or flesh. In fact; let’s start off with your bones. Remember when you were a little kid, and your bones throbbed in pain all the time? What did the grownups call that?

Continue reading

Comments Off on Hurt Your Feelings

Filed under Bad Influences, Girls of BIUL, Worst Of All

Let’s Play Nice!

“Battle not with monsters,
Lest ye become a monster.
And if ye gaze into the abyss,
The abyss gazes also into you.”

-Friedrich Nietzsche

Hi there. My name is Matty Boy Anderson. I’m a cartoonist!

See?

If you’re new to this site, thanks for coming, I’m glad you’re here. If you’re not, consider this a refresher course! This one’s for the noobs!

Continue reading

Comments Off on Let’s Play Nice!

Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Faint Signals, Girls of BIUL, Late To The Party, Nostalgic Obsessions, Robot Toy Fetish, Site Stuff

God Lives Underwater

Twenty years ago, I drew the first batch of Bands I Useta Like strips.

Twenty years ago.

Continue reading

Comments Off on God Lives Underwater

Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Don't Know Don't Care, Girls of BIUL, Magazine Rack, Thousand Listen Club

Little Girls, Little Guns

“Little Girls” is the first track off of Only A Lad, the first LP from Los Angeles new-wave band Oingo Boingo. When was only a lad, it was sort of a personal anthem. You probably know it, it starts with:

I – I – I love little girls, they make me feel so good
I love
Little girls, they make me feel so
Bad
When they’re around they make me feel like I’m the only guy in town
I love
Little girls, they make me feel so
Good

Fairly innocuous, right? It’s cute, if you don’t read too much into it. Or, avoid watching the video.

An Elfmanic episode.

Continue reading

Comments Off on Little Girls, Little Guns

Filed under Bad Influences, Faint Signals, Girls of BIUL, Nostalgic Obsessions, Thousand Listen Club

No Dark Sarcasm In The Classroom

Comedy stinks right now because you forced it to stink. You vilified every experience in life that makes a great comedian. You made the safe, sponsored version of laughter the norm. You’re so afraid to really laugh in front of other people, that you turned comedy from an anti-establishment weapon into a cottony security blanket.

Comedy stinks right now because of you. Because you’re afraid of your true feelings. 

You probably don’t even know who this is.

Let’s take, as an example, one of these pusillanimous women that the media holds up as Queens of Comedy. You know the ones, I don’t have to name them. They’re all over glossy magazine covers at the checkout aisles, making “zany” faces to remind you they’re funny. 

Continue reading

Comments Off on No Dark Sarcasm In The Classroom

Filed under Bad Influences, Faint Signals, Late To The Party, Thousand Listen Club

Phuck Phones

From BIUL III.

Continue reading

Comments Off on Phuck Phones

Filed under Bad Influences, Comix Classic & Current, Don't Know Don't Care, Faint Signals, Girls of BIUL, Idiot's Delight, Worst Of All

What You Need To Hear

I need to do my job as a website manager and give you something you need, that you didn’t know you did. Don’t get spoiled, this won’t happen very often. But if I’m hurting, which I am now more than ever, it means that the rest of the world is hurting even more.

So here’s what you need.

If it’s safe for space, it’s SFW.

Continue reading

Comments Off on What You Need To Hear

Filed under Girls of BIUL, Site Stuff, Uncategorized

PaRappa the Crapper

Long ago, in the Before Times, I was dating a woman with a very young daughter. I had not yet gelled as an artistic entity, and was in the process of learning that I’m really not cut out to be a father, even a surrogate one. This became apparent on two occasions. Both were attempts on my part to make a connection with a kid. Both failed hilariously.

The first was the purchase of a “children’s book”. I spent hours at Books-A-Million (down the block from Media Play) hunting for just the right one. It had to be colorful, clever, and not condescending. I refused to buy anything “kiddie”, on principle. It had to be something that enticed, thrilled, and sparked the imagination, like the books I read in my grade school library.

Continue reading

Comments Off on PaRappa the Crapper

Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Faint Signals, Girls of BIUL, Idiot's Delight, Nostalgic Obsessions, Robot Toy Fetish, Thousand Listen Club

The Face of Kellyanne

Last year, all I wanted to do was crack jokes about Hillary Clinton’s ever-smug face. Her daughter Chelsea, too. Throw in that awful Debbie Wasserman Shultz, and you’ve got a trifecta of ghoulish visages I was literally salivating to goof on. Caricature unflatteringly, at the least.

And I didn’t.

I didn’t make fun of the women at the Trump rally, either. I couldn’t; they were all attractive, and could possibly have shamed me as a man.

While the entire media industry decided to make fun of Donald Trump’s face, like a bus full of second-graders, I didn’t stoop to their level. And oh, they had a field day. They’re still doodling him as an anus, or a Cheeto. I’ve seen that illustration of Trump as a shit-spattered baby so many times I could forge it from memory.

Continue reading

Comments Off on The Face of Kellyanne

Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Girls of BIUL, Idiot's Delight, Worst Of All

The Kook Who Sat By The Door

If I could go back in time 20 years, and tell my 24-year-old self that I’d be signing my own comics at Criminal Records in Atlanta’s Little 5 Points, I wouldn’t believe it. Mostly because at 24 I was incredulous about the feasibility of time travel.

Three years ago, in jail, more than one dude told me I looked like Bruno Mars. I don't see it.

Three years ago, in jail, more than one dude told me I looked like Bruno Mars. I don’t see it.

I’ve guested at comic conventions before, but this was Criminal Records. They’ve had an almost mythical status since the 1990s, and their old location (it’s now Stratosphere Skateboards, another local business I highly recommend), which I visited often even before I lived here. It had cartoons drawn on the walls by Skip Williamson, Evan Dorkin and Bob Burden, just to name a few. I want to say Patty Leidy was up there too, but I’m going on memory here.  Continue reading

Comments Off on The Kook Who Sat By The Door

Filed under Comix Classic & Current, Eatable Things, Girls of BIUL, Idiot's Delight, Magazine Rack, Uncategorized